Lately I Am Feeling Very Tense


abdulsattar writes, Nowadays I am feeling very tense.
Nothing is going right.






Dear abdulsattar,

We all have these tense moments from time to time, so you are certainly normal in feeling this way. The thing that we need to keep in mind is how much this controls your life and every waking moment of the day. In that case, it is extreme and can be detrimental to your physical, emotional, and mental health.

Even if everything in your life were to be going "right" and smooth, if you are tense, it isn't going to *feel* like it is going right and it will file like a train that has gotten de-railed off the railroad tracks.

So, let's look at the tense feelings, first. It is best if we can define the root cause of the tense feelings and negativity that is creeping into your perspective. This may not be that easy to identify and may require the assistance of a therapist or counselor to help you work through and talk out your issues. In that way, if you can get to a particularly bothersome root cause, you may be able to address it or learn coping skills and methods, and that may help to alleviate the tenseness that you are felling.

In the meantime, while you are working through that, you may want to look for relaxation techniques and de-stressors, as well as positive activities. Possibly you have a favorite CD or playlist that is particularly relaxing? Maybe you enjoy reading? Please do not look up high-drama stories on the internet, but rather find something encouraging and relaxing. Hey, you could read posts here, at PositivePersistence.com and listen to my Jazz CD, streaming @ deborah.info. That's a start, eh?

A couple of things may happen, that may help with the feeling that things are not going right:

  1. As you relax, your environment will *seem* less tense and things will *seem* as if they are going better and hopefully, some things will bounce off you like "water off a duck's back."
  2. As you relax, you will be clearer in your approach to situations and will be able to address the situations in a more clam manner, helping to resolve things more efficiently and effectively, giving you a sense that things are going right again.

So, there you have it, reliving stress and a calm approach to situations around you. But, don't forget, therapies can help you work through some of those issues that are at the root cause of the tenseness.



Ask Deborah E
Deborah
Deborah is #1 Jazz Singer, as well as a lifelong musician, songwriter, and sound engineer. She is also a writer who pursues a love of positive psychology. Download the "Boost Your Energy" ebook (absolutely free!).
Deborah
6 comments… add one
  • I was actually looking for articles about stress and this just popped out. I am that one person who always feel tense especially when I am at work. It’s as if I don’t know what to do well in fact I do really know. And it is true that being tense really gets in the way. I might also take your advice to abdulsattar. Thanks!
    Gail Rogers recently posted..It’s Easy Being Green: Green Themed Makeup and AccessoriesMy Profile

    • Deborah
      Twitter:

      Thank you, Gail. I wish you tense-free days ever after! hugs, D

  • Deborah
    Twitter:

    Thank you, Gail. I wish you tense-free days ever after! hugs, D

  • Hi Deborah,
    Great advice and so true. We tend to forget the importance of relaxing our mind and body and how when we don’t stress seems to be the dominate view of life.

    How stressed can you be while getting a massage, or relaxing on a beach for example?

    • Deborah
      Twitter:

      Oooh that massage and relaxing on a beach sound good right now! Thanks, Justin 🙂

  • Deborah
    Twitter:

    Oooh that massage and relaxing on a beach sound good right now! Thanks, Justin 🙂

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